Needed someone to talk to :(

New life, New meaning, New me :)

I don't know where to start this.  SOO much has happened since the last time I updated.  Used to be such an avid blogger and I've slacked off sooo much.  Well lets see.  I moved to Lexington, Mo.  Its about 20 mins from KC & has really been a change.  I love the change.  I love the way life is going.  I've never been happier in my life :).  I'm getting married in.. wow.. like less than a week.  I can't believe how fast my life is going these days.  The only thing that would make me really really happy right now is having my kids closer :(.  I miss them so much, somedays it feels like I can barely breathe looking at their pictures.  I'm so far away now it's killing me.  But, I had to start over.  I had to keep moving with my life.  I'm really hoping that I'll eventually be able to talk Jayson into moving up here.  I think he'll really like it here.  Small town, close to everything.  I'm keeping my fingers crossed that maybe this summer I'll be able to.  I know I won't be able to last forever without my kids closer.  I'm never giving up my husband for anything in this world.  I will just have to adapt.  Ya'll don't understand how much this man has become my entire universe.  My whole life revolves around him & our future.  I know we still have soo much to learn about each other, & still yet somethings to work out, but because I believe that our love is real.. we'll make it thru anything.

The living situation here is stressful.  Not sure exactly how long all this is going to work..but sacrifices have to be made I guess.  I DO enjoy not having all the drama of kids running & screaming constantly.  Sometimes I guess we just have to deal with it.  Live sucks.  We sure do have a lot of spongers around here tho & that shit is gonna end soon!  Homie don't play that game.  This ain't the projects & I sure ain't going to live like it is.  People gonna start knocking, calling before they just show up, & they gonna start asking before they invite themselves into all our shit.  It's getting ridiculous.  If they that hungry they can take they asses home & eat!  Respect.  It's all about respect.  Some people are just born without any I guess.

Went to Hannibal today to get the rest of what we could from Megans & I's house.  We made out pretty good.  Had to have Bobbys mom & dad take us because Megans car as a busted head.  Lovely.  Soo we're going to have to find a cheap car somewhere..sucks ass.  Don't think it'll be long before we find one tho.  It's a small town.  I'm sure there are cars all over this bitch for sale!  Job hunting comes next for me.  I'm gonna be going around shortly looking hard core for one.  One that doesn't require me to give up my drug habit lol.  God knows I'd never survive without my green :).  Ok peeps.. that pretty well catches everyone up on my life :).